funnytwittertweets:

watermelonmountaindew:

ALT

i need to know every language immediately

ttvck:

whys there no emoji of a guy dead on the pavement

tiktaalic:

Did you know? On average, Tesla owners are involved in collisions 18% more frequently than any other car. Research has shown this is because when I see that stupid fucking logo i floor it.

kidovna:

I heard the new term for soulmates is ‘co-captains’?

official-lucifers-child:

imnotrevealingmyname:

crunchbuttsteak:

You can only reblog this on the 3st of January

the 3st huh?

evildoggy:

evildoggy:

every cat is its own little dude really

ive never met a cat that wasnt really weird. theyre all different guys. my cat hates soft things and refuses to sleep on anything but rough solid surfaces. never met another cat like her

clawsfangs:

clawsfangs:

the rush of validation i experience when the nurse looks at my arm and says “oh you have good veins” like yes my veins are so luscious and juicy stop or you’re gonna make my dick hard

weltenwellen:

Susan Sontag, As Consciousness Is Harnessed to Flesh